Druid and Thief Conquer the World (4)

Selinde awoke to the sound of arguing. She could make out Pikachu’s voice and a female voice that she hadn’t heard for many years. “It can’t be!” That grating know-it-all tone, it could be only one woman.

I thought that bitch was dead. Selinde’s robe slipped from her as she stood and stalked into the other room in all her naked glory. “How did you get past my words, skank!”

“You indecent harlot, you can’t talk to a High Priestess in that manner!”

“I don’t plan to do any talking at all!” Selinde’s body melted and reformed itself into the shape of a snarling Direwolf.

In her wolf form Selinde was quite a foreboding sight, larger than any natural wolf with a blood red pelt. Pikachu wondered if he should perhaps reconsider his romantic goals. Maybe I shouldn’t be in love with a bird that can eat me?

The Direwolf’s enormous form took up most of the tiny living room. It advanced, jaws snapping at Galatea. The pinched face priestess regarded Selinde with utter disdain and threw up a light shield in front of herself.

Selinde howled and leapt at Galatea,  jaws open wide knocking the priestess to the floor and landing hard on her chest.

“Don’t make me do this, Selinde!” Pikachu was holding his Rod of Obedience and pointing it in her direction.

Selinde’s black lips curled up in a snarl.

Pikachu peed a little. “Okay, I had good intentions, Galatea. I want you to remember that. but I’d rather not risk getting eaten by my best friend. Sorry. You’re on your own.”

Pikachu set down the rod and backed up. “You always were a useless lout, Pikachu. How you survived this long, I’ll never know.” Galatea spat. Then she returned her hateful gaze to Selinde. “But you! You’re the one who pushed me off a ship and left me to drown!”

“We were fighting a horde of fish zombies! You got in  the way of her attack and by the time it was over our ship had gone too far,” Pikachu reminded, when he realized Selinde couldn’t defend herself in wolf form.

“I went to hell and back!” Galatea cried. “And I just so happened to bring some of those fish zombies back with me to finish what they started!”

Galatea snapped her fingers. In a cloud of smoke appeared five decaying man-fish hybrid zombies thingys.

“Ah bollocks,” said Pikachu, before transforming into a wolf hybrid and crossing the room to join his companion in the fight.

 

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Abduction Day – Author Unknown

I can hear the rumbling engine that portends my end. The hateful behemoth sucking air and spewing smoke is only two blocks away, its intention to lead us to our destiny. I am no poet, merely a preserver of history. I want someone to know, someone to read this and feel my misery, our misery.

My mom cries in the other room. She has no power, neither do I. We will both be taken and I’m glad for once that my father is no longer living. I write this as a memory, to preserve my thoughts and feelings. Soon I will not be allowed to feel, my choice of actions reduced to lying on my back and spreading my legs for strangers.

We are told this is our duty, those females who are left. The good of the many outweigh the needs of the few. Didn’t a famous person say that once? I don’t remember their name, just as no one will remember mine.

Druid & Thief Conquer the World (3)

On our last adventure, Pikachu had given himself a nasty burn when he dove into the fire and dry humped a log!

druid

“I think I’ll just go to bed now.” Pikachu slunk off to the nearest bedroom which wasn’t much bigger than a closet. He’d only been alone with his shame for a few minutes when he heard a soft knock.

“Can I come in?”

“I guess,” he said sullenly.

Selinde sat down on the bed beside him. “What did you think you were doing just then? You know you have some nasty burns now. I’ll see what I can do.” Selinde spoke a word in druidic and placed her hands on the crispiest part of Pikachu’s skin. The wounds knitted together before his eyes.

“Thank you, but you really shouldn’t have done that.”

“It’s no… big… deal…”  Selinde fell forward and her head landed in Pikachu’s lap face down in his crotch.

“Ah!” He quickly grew a raging erection and gently rolled Selinde over to the side of the bed where she began to snore softly.

“I guess I should try and sleep.” Pickachu was exhausted but too aroused by the nearness of Selinde’s body to his. He almost jumped out of the bed when something touched the small of his back. He looked behind him to see Selinde slowly raising her knees to her chin and then kicking both her legs back down in one forceful motion. She did this many times in a row.

Having traveled with her for many years, he was well attuned to her bizarre sleeping habits. At least this time she wasn’t strutting around the room, clucking like a chicken. He wondered if it were a druid thing.

Pikachu moved himself to the front room and tried to fall asleep.

Before he drifted off, someone knocked on the door.

“Bugger off!” he called to them.

The knocking persisted.

“Oy! Don’t you know what time it is?”

The door crashed open and in walked an angry woman carrying a bag of scrolls.

The blood drained out of Pikachu when he got a look at her face.

“I- I…. Thought you were dead!” he stammered.

“Where’s Selinde?!” cried Galatea. “I won’t forgive her for what she did to me!”

To be continued!

Druid & Thief is a product of the union of Logan Grey and Mary Beecroft.

https://marybeecroft.wordpress.com/

Druid & Thief Conquer the World (2)

fire

Please reference the first entry to Druid & Thief Conquer the World before reading part two. Pikachu had just suggested the pair visit the town of Moldy Bottoms.

Selinde indulged herself in a jaw cracking yawn before answering. “I’m guessing you want more opportunities to practice your purse snatching?”

“Well, I mean there are other things we could do in the town. Maybe a tavern or..”

“I’m kidding! I don’t care what you do, just remember my invisibility wand only has one more charge.”

They walked back to the cabin and Selinde was entertained by Pikachu’s lack of skill with the bow drill. When he wasn’t paying attention she daintily flicked her wrist and a spark appeared to his delight.

I’ll let  him have that one. “Your woodcraft is improving. I’m impressed!”

Soon they had a roaring fire and if not for the rumbling in her stomach Selinde would have been fast asleep. “Too bad we didn’t have a chance to hunt. I would die for a nice rabbit stew.”

“I found these! Mushrooms have protein, right?” Pikachu handed Selinde a strange purple mushrooms with a pink spotted cap.

“I haven’t had much training in herb lore but this doesn’t look like any mushroom I’ve ever seen.” She quickly conducted a detect poison spell to see if they were safe. “I don’t know about their nutritional value, but at least they won’t kill us.” She popped a couple in her mouth and was surprised by their sweet taste. “These are actually quite good.”

The mushrooms turned out to have a strange addictive quality and both Selinde and Pikachu ate two fistfuls each. It wasn’t long before both of them were flat on their backs in the cabin staring up at the ceiling into space.

“Pikachu, I feel so strange,” Selinde whisered. “It’s like my entire body is on fire from my toes to the top of my head.” She rolled on her side to look at him. His eyes were so bright blue they seemed to glow. Had they always been so captivating. Must be the elf in him.

Pikachu also felt strange. “Selinde,” he whispered. “Where are you?” His vision  had clouded with twirling, pulsing light.

“I’m here, Pikachu. I’m waiting for you.”

She stood on the other side of the fire, her skin aglow in its golden reflection. Her eyes sparkled like emeralds.

“I’ve been waiting for you for so long,” she breathed.

Pikachus stomach dropped.”Whhaaaaaaaatt???” he croaked.

She stretched out her arms to him. ”Come to me.”

Without thinking, he leapt at her, but landed in the fire. But even third degree burns couldn’t stop the throbbing passion he felt surging beneath his trousers. After putting out the actual fire on him, he turned his inner fire to her.

“Selinde,” he moaned, while caressing her skin. It was rougher than he thought it would be, like bark.

“Enough stalling, Pik. I want you.” She went to undo his trousers.

“I just, um, I mean I might not be as big as…” he cringed as he tried to warn her about the abysmal size of his penis. Sex had evaded him too many times because of it. The women just simply couldn’t seem to continue while laughing so hard.

“What do you mean, Pik? You’re huge!”

Pikachu looked down to see he had grown exponentially.. was it some kind of magic?

He went at her with the full of his  passion.

“Pik!” her voice sounded far off. “Pik!” she said again. “Stop humping that firewood. We can’t get it wet.”

rogue

To be continued!

Druid and Thief Conquer the World is a product of the union of Logan Grey and Mary Beecroft!

https://marybeecroft.wordpress.com/

Druid & Thief Conquer the World!

druid.jpg

Selinde couldn’t believe she was still standing. The battle with that rogue band of deamons had pushed her magic to it’s limits. The saving grace had been their mistake in attacking an Arch Druid in the middle of a forest. Despite this advantage Selinde and her companion, Pikachu had barely made it out alive. Their hasty retreat and subsequent three mile trek to her safehouse in Aloryia had drained her physically. She leaned a shoulder on Pikachu and wondered not for the first time, what she would have done without his strength.

Pikachu had offered to carry Selinde, but her pride forced her to refuse. In the last three years, however, there had been a few times when she did not refuse him. They had fought many battles together, some of which they shouldn’t have survived. When Selinde was younger she had once bemoaned being the only druid left alive but she now realized that Pikachu was worth a hundred dusty old druids.

“I can set a ward for tonight, it should hold until I have my strength back. Can you make a fire?”

Pikachu’s fire making skills were shite, but he agreed. While Selinde was off doing her magic mumbo jumbo, Pikachu looked around for some wood. ‘Maybe tonight’s the night, he thought. The night Selinde would finally realize her undying love for him.

Boom! Bang! Powee! Suddenly the trees around them come crashing down.

Selinde throws up a forcefield around the two of them just in time to save the pair from being flattened by a falling tree. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, you?”

“Yes, but if anymore trees fall over I’m not sure I have the strength of shield us. What the hell could have caused that?”

The pair of them looked up to see the tree limbs above were awash in a dazzling rainbow of swirling colors.  The beings that generated the color were too small to see from so high up but the energy they generated was just as dazzling, as it was dangerous.

“Wood nymphs! It must be their mating season,” Selinde guessed.

“I’ve never seen so many of them. It’s beautiful.”

“It’s amazing that something so small can be powerful enough to uproot trees.”

“Hey!” Pickachu called. “Can you guys calm down up there? You almost killed us!”

Selinde was unable to hide the awe in her voice,“You speak Wood Nymph?”

“No, but it looks like they got the message.”

The wood nymphs quieted down. Pikachu wondered why they would want to knock over trees so they could mate, but then realized he actually didn’t care that much. He was sick of wandering around in these damn woods. The less trees the better. “Selinde, there’s a sign up ahead. Says the town of Moldy Bottom is 3 miles away. Should we go to it?”

rogue

 

To be continued!

Druid and Thief Conquer the World is an effort born from love and also boredom on the part of Logan Grey and Mary Beecroft.

https://marybeecroft.wordpress.com/

They’re Coming for Me

“It’s too early, I’m not ready for this!”

Tasha looked at me with wet eyes. She was afraid, not angry like me. That’s what happens when you have something worth losing. But if you have nothing, and no one, you get angry.

“Becks, what are we going to do? I’ve seen a few buses drive by with girls inside. They had police escorts. How is this legal?”

“It wouldn’t have been legal a year ago, but since the president declared a state of emergency all bets are off. It looks like the government is using the Gender Flu as an excuse to cancel our civil liberties.”

“But who cares about that, women are dying!”

I was naturally distrustful, it’s a side product of being orphaned at an early age. “You’ve heard what they’re saying on tv, right?  The S.A.F.E program is our best chance for survival and the continuation of the entire female population. But they can’t force us into their stupid slavery program if they can’t catch us. We’re just going to have to be clever and strong. Can you do that Tasha?”

“We aren’t going home?”

“If you go home there will be a bus parked in front of your driveway waiting. Before you even get to say goodbye to your parents those bastards will grab you!”

Tasha sniffed and blinked her eyes. “Right. Do you know anywhere we can hide?”

“There’s a place I know of where a lot of homeless people used to hang out. It’s an entrance to the underground tunnels that run underneath the city. Maybe we can hide there until all this dies down.”

“How are we going to get there without being seen?”

“The best thing we can do is to act casual and try to blend in. If we panic and run we’ll draw attention to ourselves. Here, pull your hoodie up over your head and tuck your hair in, that way it’s harder to tell you’re a girl.”

A police car rolled by us as we walked down the sidewalk with our hands in our pockets. For the first time in my life I felt grateful for my flat chest and lack of curves. Tasha was a little more developed so I had her walk on the other side of me farthest from the street. I resisted the urge to dive down an alleyway every time we saw one of the red buses drive past. The city hurricane warning siren wailed in the distance, a constant reminder that we were being hunted. The sound reverberated inside my skull and added to my natural instinct to flee. I felt Tasha’s hand slip into my own.

When we were finally in sight of Forsyth Park our pace quickened. I felt a small amount of relief until I saw the police blockade on Henry Street. We both stopped, hearts and minds racing in tandem. Tasha looked at me, her pupils had grown so large the normal hazel color of her eyes had vanished. “They’ve already seen us. If we turn around they’ll know we’re trying to avoid them. Keep your head down and stay to the right of me.”

Time moved with agonizing slowness as we walked those few blocks to where the blockade was set. There were two police cars with one officer each, but thankfully, no red bus. We were nearly within earshot of the officers I warned Tasha to keep looking forward and continue walking at a regular speed.

“Hey, you two boys!”

I turned slowly to look at the man who’d spoken to us.

“There’s a rumor about a secret hideout somewhere in this area, possibly underground. We think there might be some females trying to avoid the S.A.F.E protocol by hiding out. Do you know of a place around here like that?”

There was no avoiding it now. As soon as one of us answered him the illusion would be broken. “Get ready to run.”

“Hey, I asked you a question. You deaf or something?” He started walking toward us.

“Tasha do you remember where we used to hang out after school in 8th grade?”

“You mean that closed down café on Wright Square?”

“Yeah. Meet me there and we’ll try to come up with a plan. One, two, three, go!”

I took off running as fast as my thin legs could manage. I suddenly regretted turning down my high school track coaches suggestion to join the school team. I was huffing and and puffing within seconds but sheer terror kept me moving forward.

I took a left and ran down Bull Street as Tasha turned right onto Gaston. She was taking the long way around and I silently hoped she would be able to make it to the café.

“Stop, or I’ll shoot!”

The cops shouted threats behind me as they tried to give chase. I knew they weren’t going to shoot me. Despite the terrible things the government was now allowed to do, females were growing more valuable every day as more of us died. They fired into the air and I stumbled to the ground as if I’d been hit. I took a moment to look behind me and saw that the officer was at least fifty feet back holding his knees and gasping.

I turned down an alley and surprised the old man that ran Angels BBQ. He shouted and jumped out of my way.  As I rounded the corner a red bus was winding around the square. I climbed in through a broken window in what used to be The Wright Square Café.

I heard the bus engine in the distance as it traveled down Bull Street, police sirens joined the sound. An ear piercing scream made the small hairs on my arms stand on end. It was Tasha, they must have her. I got to my feet and started for the window when a hand gripped my shoulder and held me firmly in place.

I turned around to face a middle aged woman with dirty blonde hair and mud on her face. “You can’t help her now. Going out there is suicide.”

My lower lip trembled as the sounds of Tasha’s protests grew fainter. Hot tears stung my eyes and rolled down my cheeks. The fact that I was crying only made me angrier.

“I know,” the woman said and pulled me into a hug.

I had never felt so useless.