Bangkok Fight Night

Yeah I wish I was traveling abroad but this actually took place in downtown Atlanta.  I saw some kickboxing muay thai and MMA bouts.  I had a front row seat and almost felt like the fighters were going to explode outside the ring and land on me at certain times in the night.

When we first got there I had barely finished kicking a little skank to the curb, who thought she was going to sit in my spot, before someone was already on the ground with his eyes rolled back in his head breathing deeply.  I have been to only one other live event so I didn’t have much to compare this too but it was really exciting to me.

The energy of the crowd was infectious and the loud metal music was getting me hyped up for what was coming.  The first knock out was the only one of the night but some of the submissions were really cool. I was so close to the ring I actually worried if I would get sprayed with blood when this guys nose was busted.

In between bouts I was entertained by a weird old gray haired man with a significant pot belly who danced in his jeans and button up dress shirt as if he were having sex with some invisible partner standing in front of him.

This strange mating dance which covered quite a lot of ground and seemed to get increasingly more graphic as the night wore on, was abruptly ended when an employee came over and forced him to sit down.  Dancing man promptly fell asleep in his chair.

I happened to be there with several of my favorite people to see my good friend Victoria who will hereafter be referred to by me as “Ladykiller,” fight a Pigmy girl.  When I say that I mean the girl was about 5ft 3 inches tall. She came out to 99 problems by Jay-Z and was all smiles as she touched her gloves to our fists. I don’t know if it helped but I yelled encouragement as loud as could.  I yelled with my entire being until I felt dizzy.  And she did not disappoint.

There were axe kicks and superman punches a plenty!  I actually have only seen a few people attempt to do a superman punch but Ladykiller pulled it off with ease landing every one.  And hows about a heel on your ear?  I bet that pigmy liked it. After all that the misguided little girl thought she won she came over to Ladykillers side and bowed to her touching her face to LK’s gloves glowing because of her victory.  Then the decision was announced and everyone from Pigmy’s gym, Hard Knock, yelled boos at my friend.  To which we all responded with cheers to counterbalance it.

I was so pissed that they were trying to take away her win with their rudeness.  I ran over to the other side and emptied a beer on someone’s head.  Well, not really but wouldn’t it have been more fun if I did?


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