When I was still in college I thought that by the time I’m the age I am now, I’d be famous, or rich or both. At least, I would be on definite career path and have acquired some marketable job skills. I still haven’t managed any of this. And there just isn’t one thing that I seriously love doing enough to commit my entire life to it.
I came up with a great idea for a lunch truck business while randomly gossiping with my hairstylist. We were bouncing ideas off of each other about what the truck would look like and the 80’s themed names our sandwiches would have. The truck would tweet its location every day and have its own facebook page. We would blast 80’s hair metal on a speaker outside the truck, her idea, and park at odd hours of the night outside clubs and bars, my idea. It would be some loud ass purple color or something equally eye catching. We were both so keen on this idea that we made an appointment at a later time to meet and get a business plan together.
I began to look into the logistics and the financial aspect of this idea. I realized there wasn’t anything like a mobile lunch truck in Savannah but that it was very popular in the northern states. That got me thinking as to why this might be… Then I realized during the summer months it might be nearly unbearable to cook inside the truck when temperatures reached over one hundred many days. I did go so far as making an appointment with the local Small Business Association, which I never kept. They offer free advice on how to write a business plan and how to obtain financing.
Of course none of the financing or marketing mattered because the simple fact was that I don’t really know how to cook. And when it came to thinking of what foods I would actually serve, I drew a big blank. Basically, I just thought it would fun to screw around in the truck all day, selling magical food that appeared without my effort, and that everyone found delicious.
My next idea had a bit more staying power because I have some sort of a plan as to how it can be accomplished. I want to be a personal trainer. I love exercising, and aside from writing, it’s the most fun thing I do. No matter what the problem is, I always feel better after a good cardio workout. I feel more relaxed, more focused and it always seems that whatever insurmountable difficulty I have to face is slightly less difficult afterward. I also feel that my enthusiasm can be infectious. I drug along many a co-worker to classes they wouldn’t normally try such as pilates, yoga, spinning or kickboxing. I felt as if my passion and ability to encourage others could translate into a career. The only problem with this is I’m not sure if I could physically handle the challenge.
As much as I hate to admit it having Type 1 diabetes can sometimes make intense exercise difficult for me. I’ll be in the middle of a run when all the sudden my legs start to feel like noodles. I have to immediately stop running, hobble to my car and find something sugary. What if I had a classroom full of people in front of me leading them in some sort of vigorous exercise routine of mine and my blood sugar bottomed out? I couldn’t expect my students to do things that I couldn’t do! Also, there is a lot of cost involved with the certification tests and the hours of studying would be a huge time investment. The biggest thing is I’m scared that if working out all day with a class or personally training someone was my job, I would grow to hate it just like everything else I’ve ever tried.
I’m starting to think that those people who profess that they love what they’re doing for a living really are full of shit. I didn’t think that at 31 I’d still be trying to figure out who I am and what I want to be when I “grow up.” I’m already there and I still don’t know! Those are those rare moments of clarity, like right now, when I’m just sitting at my computer happily recording my thoughts and I think, “this is it.” Deep down I really know what I want, and I know who I am. No matter what other roles I have in life, I am a writer first. I just haven’t figured out how to make money at it yet.